lauantai 10. tammikuuta 2015

I tried reading the older posts

Wow, such GARBAGE. What a CHILD.

You have no idea how much stepping out of your room can change you before you actually try.

Personally and politically and in every way, my thinking is a lot more coherent than it used to be. Just a few months ago I was somebody else. Then I found people. I've started to see others around me. I'm a lot more honest, and I guess I just got tired of the 'I am so fucking great' joke. I am eternally thankful that when I finally left the house, people told me a million times: "You're full of nonsense. Stop pretending and shut the fuck up. This can't be you."

It took a while, but then I started listening.

This doesn't mean that I'm incredibly smart or incredibly honest now, but I think it's getting better. I guess I just needed all the nonsense because I was so lonely and so sad. I'm not bad, but I'm not always good. Sadness and loneliness are horrible things.

2 kommenttia:

  1. Okay, I tried reading them again, and they're not THAT bad.

    Like this one for instance: http://brande-r.blogspot.fi/2014/01/politically-correct.html I wasn't completely incapable of thinking clearly. And this is great: http://brande-r.blogspot.fi/2014/02/every-day-is-like-sundays.html

    VastaaPoista
  2. For a long time, this blog was the place where I wrote most of the depressing activism posts, and the Finnish blog was the place where I wrote freely and passionately.

    In many, many ways, the Finnish blog is clearly better than this one.

    And that is sad. Because IF things go right, there'll be somebody in Poland or Sweden or Japan or Canada or Ethiopia who'd like to read those better posts, but can't because the posts are in Finnish. Maybe I'll find somebody to translate them. (Um, yeah, I still think that I'm very important.)

    VastaaPoista